Halloween XXXVIII

Posted on November 1, 2008 by travellinbaen

Quote of the Day (a few minutes after the day is over) “Candy, Candy, Candy I can’t let you go; all my life you’ve been haunting me, I loved you so.”     –Iggy Pop, Candy

People love Halloween. TB thinks its ok. Specifically, but in no particular order, and segue-free (it’s late), here are some observations on what is to me, an overrated occasion:

  • I’ll accentuate the positive. In the past, above all what made Halloween worthwhile to me were “slutty nurses”, “slutty flappers”, “slutty tigresses”, “slutty witches”, etc. 
  • Of course the abundance of candy from “trick or treating” is the best known benefit of Halloween. Candy variety is great as is the surprise factor. But I think there is a special punishment waiting in the afterlife for people in good neighborhoods that give out one tootsie roll, one jolly rancher, or any number of Mary Janes. I’ve always been unnaturally bitter about these houses. I don’t know why. 
  • I can’t remember a time when I liked dressing up in a costume. I wish I liked it because I see people having a good time with it. This personal distaste I trace back to the crummy plastic costumes of the 1970’s. Here I thought I was going to look like Batman or a pirate and all I get is a rigid, crinkly piece of plastic and a suffocating mask with a defective rubber band. And I looked nothing like Batman or a pirate.
  • What I liked most about Halloween as a kid was the freedom. Five o’clock meant heading to Eastlawn Elementary for the school carnival which always engendered a sense of excitement and endless possibility. An hour later the realization that my costume sucked, the prizes for the games were junk, and I would never win a cakewalk had hit home and sucked the energy out of the holiday. But practical thinker that I was, I never let my disillusionment with another Halloween prevent me from heading out after the carnival down Woodhaven Street, over to Singing River and across to Eastwood and Westwood, collecting my loot and staying out as long as possible, sometimes on a school night, without adult supervision and with enough other kids known to be outdoors to make anything plausibly deniable. Mischief without consequences…this was freedom.
  • I hate giving out candy at the door. Don’t get me wrong….I buy good candy and always make sure each plastic pumpkin gets both quality chocolates and sweet treats. And I’m happy to give it away, especially to the little ones. But I never know what to say. After awhile I begin to feel dishonest and hypocritical saying “you look so scary”, “you look just like Batman”, or “your the prettiest princess I’ve seen.” Most of these kids probably know they look nothing like they had in mind when they got their idea of what to be, and it just cheapens the whole experience to say otherwise. And I hate that the kids have to say the perfunctory magic words, without enthusiasm, at house after house, just because the man says they must. I don’t want to be an enforcer of that oppression and conformity! I think I could enjoy passing out the candy more if it were just open and honest. I think the kid would feel better if I said, “dude, I’ve been there. A pirate sounds good, but it’s hard to make your vision come off just right, ain’t it?”
  • I always try to look in the kids’ pumpkins to see what kind of stuff they’re bringing in this year. It gives me a good idea about the economy (saw lots of tootsie rolls and candy corn this year–not good), and tells me a bit about the neighbors.
  •  I’ve come to be more tolerant of people bringing their kids in from foreign neighborhoods, but I get a little steamed about 15 year olds holding pillow cases in my face. If I knew where you could buy Mary Janes I’d fix them good. Or if it were plausibly deniable I’d egg their cars.
  • This year I walked around with my little girl. We expected to hit about three houses and be done. But the kid knew a good thing when she saw it. She clutched her cousin the princess’ hand in one of hers and her pumpkin in the other and determinedly marched all over Oxford collecting items concerning which she had no knowledge or experience. She did not know why people were putting things in her pumpkin, nor what she would do with it, but she knew that she liked it. Up one street and down another, patiently standing in lines at the most popular houses and waiting resolutely for slowly reacting benefactors on the side streets. She took nothing out of the pumpkin and carefully avoided eye contact with either of her parents. She neither spoke nor laughed. No crying, no running or disobeying. No resting. No attempts to remove the silly bunny ears from her head. It was as if she understood she was on a roll that could not be explained; one which she must not interrupt by doing anything to disrupt the moment. Not even two years old, yet she intuitively understands that you do not (mess) with a winning streak. Finally, her little legs could go no more. She acquiesced  to being placed in her stroller and with pumpkin clutched firmly still, stared in catatonic reflection and exhaustion until we made it back home.
  • Halloween was fun this year. I didn’t see any slutty flappers, but also no teens with pillow cases, and no Mary Janes, and I wasn’t called upon to hand out the candy; and I walked around foreign neighborhoods on a crisp night under a bright crescent moon with the prettiest princess and the funniest bunny and saw some really big smiles, even from the little one when she couldn’t hold it in any more. I can’t wait for Christmas.
Posted in Humor, Life | Tagged , , , , , , | 3 Comments

Thursday Pickin X

Posted on October 30, 2008 by travellinbaen

Quote of the Day     “But I somehow someway keep coming up with funky ass s**t every day.”  as sung by the Gourds covering Snoop, Gin and Juice

We had 9 POTW winners last week. TB and Pitalo were hard luck losers. Musical points were awarded to Zeek for Song of the Week for “Gin and Juice” by the Gourds. He had three votes and his shrewd decision to vote for himself propelled him past Pitalo for SOTW and past Feidt’s Follies as weekly champ. RMac took home theme of the week with three votes, list of the week had no clear winner, with one vote apiece to several players. Be sure to participate and vote on your tunes next week. And beware of TB’s wrath if you self vote and I deem it bad form. Last week’s standings, with bonus picks specified, POTW winners end with number 9:

  1. Zeek (4-1); a big move up the charts this week.
  2. RSR; brings it every week.
  3. Feidt’s Follies (4-1); The usual.
  4. Ed; a no points shout out for post of the week. I laughed out loud, though I daresay I may have been the only one.
  5. Sweet; seemed like old times last weekend.
  6. MD; still dizzy from the teapot rides.
  7. Adam (1-1); co-TB-right-wing tormenter of the week.
  8. Fig (2-3); go ahead and put your crap on the blog Fig–I don’t mind being outnumbered. I just hope y’all aren’t jumping all over me if we establish a Kremlin before Christmas.
  9. Face  (0-2); The Greenies are bound to be better next year.
  10. Pitalo (5-0); two votes for Train in Vain, and I almost voted for Ain’t No Sunshine–that broke the tie ahead of TB. BTW, Pitalo has kicked butt every week I think. Sweet, you watchin?
  11. TB  (5-0); I’ve been unconscious for three weeks. You might want to spend some money in Vegas going against me this week.
  12. RMac; Theme of the week winner
  13. TKH (4-1); Thanks for the invite to the money payin pickem game.
  14. SC (3-1); TB loves a link.
  15. Larry (3-1); I might need you to get me a prescription written.
  16. Smily (3-2); keep on pickin the Bullies.
  17. OB (2-3); so close to breakin through. 
  18. Greeg (1-2); glad you’re back.  
  19. BR MIA–dude? WTF?
  20. JLM–posted, then lit out for Horn without pickin. 

The updated standings:

  1. TB  273
  2. Fig  263
  3. Feidt’s Follies  263
  4. RMac  262
  5. Rock Star 251
  6. Pitalo  232
  7. Supercynic  231
  8. OB  226
  9. Ed  219
  10. Adam 219
  11. Sweet 209
  12. Larry 203
  13. Face  191
  14. Smily  188
  15. Zeek  187
  16. MD  179
  17. JLM  150
  18. Greeg 140
  19. BR  130
  20. TKH  130

My picks:

  • West Virginia  -4′
  • Florida -5′
  • BYU  -14
  • Arkansas +6′
  • Oklahoma -21′

POTW–Texas -3′

My Tunes

Posted in Music, Sports | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , | 43 Comments

If I Had a Million Dollars

Posted on October 29, 2008 by travellinbaen

Quote of the Day     “If I had a million dollars, I’d buy you a green dress; but not a real green dress, that’s cruel.”     Barenaked Ladies

TB thought it would be a good idea to lighten the mood a bit heading in to tomorrow’s pickem post. Plenty of politics are down below if you’re up for the discussion. But in today’s hard economic times, I love to play the “what would I do with a million bucks game.” Here are the rules–none of it is taxed, none of it can be saved or invested, and none of it can go to charity, friends or family, TB excluded. Your job is secure, and you don’t have to work until the money is gone. You’ve got one year, spend away. Here’s my budget:

  1. Buy that convertible I’ve been waiting for all these years. About 60 grand will get me all I want and more. That leaves 940K.
  2. Tahiti, Bora Bora, Raratunga, and whatever other little Pacific Islands I can find. RMac might be able to help me choose. This I’m doing first class all the way–100K sounds right, leaving 840.
  3. I gotta go skiing. A lot. One trip to Steamboat for the January Music Festival that CCR and REK always play, a trip to Whistler, one in the Alps and one down in South America. No need to go overboard on these, but I’ll spend about 10K on each trip, leaving me with 800.
  4. When I get to South America, I’ll stay awhile. I’ll rent a villa, hire a consigliere to get me around and teach me the language and I’ll see Macchu Pichu at dawn. I don’t know how American currency is holding up down South, but I figure 100K would do the trick, so I’ve still got 700. It occurs to me at this point that having a million bucks to spend would be even sweeter than I first thought.
  5. I’ve always wanted to drive cross country, so in mid-spring I’ll hop in the convertible and go. First west until I have to stop, then up the Pacific Coast Highway to the border, then across the northern mountains, the Great Plains and eventually to Maine. By then I’ll be sick of the car so I’ll get someone to drive it back to Mississippi and I’ll hop on a plane. Fifty grand ought to be plenty for what I have in mind, so I’m down to 650 and I’ve already done most of my travel fantasies–but not all.
  6. It’s time to cruise to the Galapagos and see what all the fuss is about. Ten thousand will be plenty, and that will take care of my immediate travel wishes, with 640 burning a whole in my pocket.
  7. I want a high def TV and I keep putting it off. So I’ll get 4. Big ones. And pay somebody to come hang them on the walls and make them work. Five more grand spent and 635 to go.
  8. I really need a wheelbarrow to help me get the yard cleaned up. I think I’ll add a team of Mexican laborers to actually clean it. But I get to keep the wheelbarrow (pronounced wheelbarrel). That should set me back a C-note, so its now $634,900.00.
  9. Jimmy Buffett plays a concert in Ridgeland. I’d like to make it free and invite the public, but that would smack of philanthropy, so it’ll just have to be in my back yard with a few invited guests. Jimmy’s gettin old. I ought to be able to make this happen for under a 100.
  10. When you have a million and you are from Pascagoula there is one thing about which you have no choice. You gotta buy a boat. A big one. That’s where the rest of the money goes, save a bit for fishing gear and a couple of cases of beer. The rest of you Goula boys (and girls), I’ll see y’all out at Horn Island once you get your boats picked out.
Posted in Humor, Life, Lists | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , | 14 Comments

Travellinbaen’s Political Consulting Service (spreading the acorns edition)

Posted on October 28, 2008 by travellinbaen

Quote of the Day     “My attitude is that if the economy’s good for folks from the bottom up, it’s gonna be good for everybody. If you’ve got a plumbing business, you’re gonna be better off if you’ve got a whole bunch of customers who can afford to hire you, and right now everybody’s so pinched that business is bad for everybody and I think when you spread the wealth around, it’s good for everybody.”     –Barack Obama to Joe the Plumber

Only one more week to go before the Presidential election and it seems we’re down to just a few talking points. For Obama, its “vote for me or get four more years of Bush.” And for McCain, it’s “Obama wants to spread the wealth”, “ACORN” sux, and “Joe the Plumber knows as much about the economy as me and that diva backstabbing bitch Sarah.”  I don’t think the Obama campaign really needs Travellinbaen’s advice. In a year that saw possibly the worst campaigns in history run by Hillary Clinton and Rudy Giulliani, only to be topped by the McCain debacle, I think they’ve been magnificent. (Yes, I’ve mentally chalked it up, and yes, I realize how “the Power” might react.) But I’ll advise them anyway. As for McCain, I don’t even know where to start–maybe get a time machine and go back to 2000 to remember who you really are, then jump back ahead to August 2008. Short of that, hell maybe your race baiting will carry the day. Anyway, I’m ignoring plumberjoe because I don’t think people are falling for that gimmick, but here’s TB’s easy solutions to the ACORN and Wealth Spreading issues.

It seems ACORN pays the otherwise unemployable contractors to go around signing people up to vote. These folks get paid for each registration form they submit. It is apparently difficult to get strangers to write down their personal information and hand it back to you, so these guys just go find a phone book and start copying names. The more enterprising contractors have found that by watching football and cartoons you can kill two birds with one stone–enjoy some quality entertainment and get ideas for names to write in to registration forms. Unfortunately, this freaks some people out. I did not know this, but apparantly the USA has been plagued for many years by people electing liberals by voting numerous times under such names as Mickey Mouse, Roger Staubach and Smily, without ever being suspected of such perfidy by our crack poll volunteer staffs. It’s a real problem, and once again, TB’s PCS has a simple solution. Outlaw voter registration altogether. Seriously. If you are a citizen of the United States, you vote and your social security number is noted in some great computer in a bunker in Nebraska and you can’t vote again. It’s done. What’s the point of registration anyway? We all ostensibly believe in democracy and we all ostensibly want voter turnout to be high. So just make everybody eligible. I’ll take it one step further, let them vote online and do it anytime within a couple of weeks of the election. This should be especially popular with conservatives because it will obviate the raison d’etre of ACORN (blank stare–French thrown in just to offend the freedom fry crowd).

As for spreading the wealth, TB doesn’t understand the uproar mild public discourse this issue has caused. All politics is about spreading the wealth. Generally liberals want it spread more evenly, like a peanut butter sandwich that is tasty from first to last bite, while conservatives want all their peanut butter straight off the spoon so it doesn’t get sullied by the proletariat favoring white bread. Obama campaign, you need your pithy talking point. TB’s peanut butter sandwich is all made up and ready for you to savor. Warn the people that if you eat all that peanut butter straight off the spoon, its hard to swallow and they will probably have to bail out their mouth with a big jug of milk that’s liable to spill everywhere when you rush to prevent yourself from choking. You could even offer a bite your sensible tasty sandwich to Joe the idiot plumber out on the campaign trail. Maybe then he’d understand what you’re advocating….that what this whole campaign really boils down to how you like your peanut butter.

 


Posted in Humor, Politics | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , | 4 Comments

The Fly in the Ointment of Conservative Theory

Posted on October 27, 2008 by travellinbaen

Quote of the Day     “Those of us who have looked to the self-interest of lending institutions to protect shareholder equity, myself included, are in a state of shocked disbelief.”     Alan Greenspan, last week

Henry Waxman asked former Fed chairman Alan Greenspan last week if his conservative ideology pushed him to make decisions about the economy he now regrets. Greenspan said “yes, I’ve found a flaw.” The flaw is astoundingly well summed up in today’s quote of the day. It seems so simple, yet very few of us saw it, and even though the great Warren Buffett DID see it and told us about it, none of us listened. The individuals running our great financial institutions were looking out for themselves, and did not see their interests as aligned with those of their companies. They made deals to create short term wealth and illusory wealth to appear on balance sheets. In return, they received millions of dollars in bonuses. What happened after they cashed their checks was none of their concern.

This is the achilles heal of conservative economic theory. Conservatives, including TB in past times, have always believed that if the top echelon of wealth holders were doing well, it was in their interest to keep a well funded underclass to keep the machine churning out ever more wealth. The middle class would benefit from successful American businesses by buying their stock and getting an ownership interest in the economy they were supporting. Too much regulation by government, often derisively termed “interference”, would simply siphon off corporate profits, leaving less for the middle class to share. So the interference was removed over the course of thirty years or so, bit by bit, piece by piece. Even most Democrats went along with the effort, notably Bill Clinton. 

But we all overlooked the most obvious pitfall. We equated the businesses themselves with the individuals who run them. The businesses, in the end, have failed–GM, AIG, Merrill Lynch, Wachovia, Bear Stearns, and so many more. The men who ran them have not failed. Like DB Cooper, they jumped out of the planes with all the cash and a golden parachute. But DB at least had the courtesy to leave the plane functional when he leapt. These guys destroyed the engines, then jumped.

Someone once famously said those who ignore history are doomed to repeat it. We ignored the lessons our grandparents and great-grandparents learned back in 1929, and now history is repeating itself to a large degree. There is a reason for government regulation. Sure, it slows down business growth to some extent. But it stops many of those individuals who would loot businesses and their shareholders in their tracks. It shines light on their schemes. Just like a football referee, the government is never popular, especially when its presence in the game is obvious. No one likes a game marred by too many holding flags, and its often said there is holding on every play. Similarly, in regulating business, the government will undoubtedly throw too many flags sometimes, and miss other times it should’ve thrown one. But without the refs, the game is just a street fight over a ball. And without government regulation, our economy is just a street fight over control of wealth. It’s time all conservative thinkers admit their flaw in philosophy. 

There is common ground between American liberals and conservatives. That is that most everyone agrees the ultimate goal is to make increased wealth available to all. There is legitimate difference of opinion on how that should be accomplished. Conservatives must first admit, like Greenspan, that all of their assumptions are partially based on a faulty premise. And liberals, poised to have a chance to implement their own ideas, must remain aware that a faulty premise most likely lurks inside their own ideology. Both sides must learn to concede the points on which they have been obviously wrong and use the other side’s ideas to improve the collective action our government must take. I haven’t seen that in many years. I hope the next administration controls its hubris enough to remember this lessen from the dying conservative movement.

Posted in Philosobaen, Politics | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , | 20 Comments

Thursday Pickin IX, (mid-season twist edition)

Posted on October 22, 2008 by travellinbaen

Quote of the Day     “Games lubricate the body and mind.”     —Ben Franklin

As I try to extend the reach of this humble blog, the last thing I want to do is win the Thursday Pickin Grand Exalted Prize and thusly diminish the credibility of the editor. But just past the halfway point in the season, TB finds himself on top of the heap. Would one of you please get hot and pass me? 

The title of this week’s pick’em post references a mid-season twist, and I’m sure you are all dying to find out what it is. Will TB reverse the field like they do at the Nascar All-Star race? Is there to be a playoff, dance-off, or smack-off? Is (are?) a new crop of eligible young pickers going to be introduced mid-season to challenge the tired old pickers? Unfortunately……no.

But from now on, the bonus points for tunes will be awarded by you. Starting Saturday and going through Monday, comment below the picks on your choice for song of the week, list of the week and theme of the week. I’ll award the bonus points as you dictate.

Here’s how it went down last week, with POTW winners comprising the top 6, bonus picks in parentheses:

  1. TB (4-1)
  2. SC (3-1)
  3. Face (2-1)
  4. Pitalo (3-2) and cheesiest song of the week
  5. Larry (1-3)
  6. Zeek (1-4)
  7. JLM 1-1 in POTW’s and 16-9 overall; TB is very forgivin of drunken posting, but I will not look fondly upon another 29 pick post. That having been said, 17-9 overall ain’t too shabby.
  8. Feidt’s Follies 1-1 in POTW’s (3-2) and a permanent bonus for having at least two of us living vicariously through him.
  9. Sweet 1-1 in POTW’s (2-4) with a system of picks last week.
  10. OB lost the POTW along with the remainder of the list, not counting the no-shows. (4-1)
  11. Ed–Song of the Week winner
  12. Adam (2-1)
  13. Smily (2-2); honorable mention nudity theme
  14. Fig (3-2); tri-winner of list of the week in a three way tie. I had sympathy for the POTW losers.
  15. RSR; another tri-winner of the list of the week
  16. RMac; final list of the week tri-winner and theme of the week champ
  17. Actually 17-20, 10 points each to MD, BR, TKH and Greeg, all missing in action. Was it something I said?
Overall standings:
  1. TB  239
  2. RMac  227
  3. Fig  224
  4. Feidt’s Follies  219
  5. Rock Star Rambler  206
  6. Supercynic  201
  7. Pitalo  197
  8. OB  196
  9. Adam  179
  10. Ed  176
  11. Larry  172
  12. Sweet  167
  13. Smily  160
  14. Face  153
  15. JLM  142
  16. MD  138
  17. Zeek  132
  18. Greeg  113
  19. BR  110
  20. TKH  92
My picks
  • Georgia  +2
  • Oklahoma -19
  • West Virginia  -3′
  • Penn St  -2′
  • Notre Dame  -10′
POTW
  • USC  -15
My tunes
  • Come Monday–Jimmy Buffett
  • Streets of Bakersfield–Dwight Yoakum
  • Little Old Lady from Pasadena–The Beach Boys
  • Folsom Prison Blues–Johnny Cash
  • Song of the Week–Beverly Hills–Weezer (dedicated to J. Gurrieri, who checks in every once in awhile) 
Posted in Music, Sports | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , | 38 Comments

The Right Place at the Wrong Time Club

Posted on October 21, 2008 by travellinbaen

Quote of the Day     “I been in the right place, but it must have been the wrong time; I’d have said the right thing, but I must have used the wrong line.”     –Dr. John

As promised, here’s TB’s companion list to “The Right Place at the Right Time Club”

9.    Excellent MSU Bulldog kicker Artie Cosby, to win, or lose the Egg Bowl, Jackson, Mississippi, 1983 (link)

8.    Glacier National Park, circa 2030, sans glaciers.

7.    John McCain in 2000.

6.    Isabelle Adjani–a hot French actress who was ready to break out in the USA back in 1987. She was cast as the female lead opposite superstars Warren Beatty and Dustin Hoffman. In Ishtar (blank stare).

5.    Ray Perkins–got his dream job at his alma mater, the University of Alabama in 1983. It was after Bear Bryant’s retirement and before his death. I can imagine Bear’s advice to Perkins after his hiring. “Ray, this job is a piece of cake. The fans are gonna love you. But you gotta be your own man. The first thing you ought to do is tear down that stupid tower I used to stand on at practice.”

4.    Prince’s publicist, during the unpronounceable name years.

3.    Brian Bosworth, linebacker. One night back in 1987, Bosworth got himself properly positioned to tackle Bo Jackson on Monday Night Football. It didn’t work out too well (link)  and the Boz shortly thereafter quit being a hack football player and became a hack actor.

2.    Some old dude standing next to TB at the Rainbow Casino several years ago. Perennial craps loser, TB, took his turn with the dice, betting 5 dollar chips. Old crusty dude next to me is using black $100 chips and some color TB is not used to, nor the Rainbow I suspect. TB shot for 35 minutes, hitting at least a dozen points. Old dude bet the don’t pass. The whole time. Continually increasing his stake. (Stone guffawed and piroutted at the other end of the table the whole time.)

1.     Pete Best, drummer.

Posted in Humor, Lists | Tagged , , , , , | 6 Comments

The Right Place at the Right Time Club

Posted on October 20, 2008 by travellinbaen

Quote of the Day     “Please do not send fan mail to any address you have. Nothing will be signed after the 20th of October. If that is the date on the envelope its gonna be tossed. I’m warning you with peace and love, I have too much to do.”     –Ringo Starr (link)

I was surprised and amused to come across Ringo’s message to fans in the article linked above, and thought I’d share it. Please don’t tell Ringo, but my thanks go out to him for reminding me of a list I’ve been meaning to publish: “The Right Place at the Right Time Club.”

10.  Those other two dudes in U2–I’m sure they are great musicians and all, but really…bang the skins a little and learn the bass and then meet up with Bono and the Edge….well done fellas.

9.    Buck Belue, Georgia quarterback in 1980–I can imagine Vince Dooley saying “Buck, meet Herschel. Herschel, meet Buck. Buck, you’re going to be giving the ball to Herschel from now on.”

8.    Mark Hamill, Luke Skywalker–George Lucas–“Mark, you’re not that good of an actor, and that’s just what we’re looking for. You wouldn’t believe how many good actors we’ve suffered through waiting to find someone like you. This is the one and only role you’re ever gonna have, but trust me, it’s a good one.” 

7.   Steve Ballmer, Microsoft–Don’t you just know back around 1977 this dude was thinking, “ok, this is the last nerd I pal around with. This time I mean it.”

6.    All the attorneys that worked for Dick Scruggs in Pascagoula around 2001.

5.    Buster Douglas, boxer. When he beat Mike Tyson, Tyson was thought unbeatable. It was such a shock, I remember where I was standing and who I was with when I got the news (the Landing, with Smily). Even Buster could’ve had no idea Tyson had gone off the deep end and was vulnerable to a hack like himself. 

4.     Dan Quayle, Vice President–only in America.

3.     The third tenor–as made famous by Seinfeld:

FRANK: The Maestro? What Maestro?

ELAINE: He’s this guy that I went to Tuscany with. He’s a great guy, but I just wouldn’t feel comfortable calling him.

GEORGE: Really? Why?

ELAINE: (Explaining) Because he hasn’t called me since we got back.. I spilled wine on his 8 by 10 photo of one of his favorite Italian opera stars.

GEORGE: Who?

ELAINE: You know the Three Tenors?

GEORGE: Yeah.. (Trying to remember) Paverotti.. Domingo.. and.. uh.. the other guy.

ELAINE: (Nodding) The other guy.

2.    TB getting picked by J’s Floor Covering in 1976, getting Mrs. Barber for World History in 1983, and going to Elixir one night in 2004.

1.    Ringo

Posted in Humor, Lists | Tagged , , , , , , | 5 Comments

A Hotel Conversation

Posted on October 17, 2008 by travellinbaen

For your Friday entertainment, a true conversation follows. This may only be amusing to road warriors.

TB–(calling front desk) Hi, my wife is in a meeting here today and I wanted to see about getting a late checkout.

Hotel Operator–Good morning sir. I’m sure that won’t be a problem. Hold while I transfer you.

Hotel Clerk–(after at least 12 rings)–Good Morning Sir! May I help you?

TB–Hi, my wife is in a meeting at the hotel this morning and I wanted to see about getting a late checkout.

Hotel Clerk–Good Morning Sir!! Your wife has a fax at the front desk.

TB–Ok, thanks. Is the late checkout ok?

Hotel Clerk–I’m sure that will be no problem sir! Let me transfer you to the Bell Captain.

Bell Captain–Good Morning Sir!!! How may I help you?

TB–My wife has a meeting here this morning and I want to see about getting a late checkout.

Bell Captain–I’m sure that will be no problem sir! Let me transfer you to Guest Services.

TB–(blank stare)

Guest Services–Good Morning Sir!!!! How may I help you?

TB–Hi, my wife is in a meeting here this morning and I wanted to see about getting a late checkout.

Guest Services Bitch–Ohhhhhhh, I’m sorry sir. We have a lot of people checking in today. No late checkouts.

TB–(Angry Glare)

Posted in Humor, Life, Travel | Tagged , , , , , | 2 Comments

Checkin in From Nashville

Posted on October 17, 2008 by travellinbaen

Travellinbaen’s up in Nashville today waiting on a meeting to end. We drove up last night in the misting rain, but the sun came up this morning and brightened up this trip considerably. The morning revealed our hotel’s prime location. I’m looking down on the Ryman Auditorium and I can see the Titans’ stadium a few blocks away. Since TB’s travellin with a tot, goin out to hear tunes and general carousin is not a possibility. We’re trying to decide whether to drive two hundred miles to cruise the Smokies, a bit less than that to see the Bluegrass and Keeneland, to crawl back through north Alabama and Birmingham, or to find something here in Music City. There wasn’t any time for planning, obviously.

Any suggestions?

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