TB’s Long Weekend

Quote of the Day:

“I hate war as only a soldier who has lived it can, only as one who has seen its brutality, its futility, its stupidity.”      —Dwight Eisenhower

First of all, sorry about the crummy picture of Stone Mountain. Long, boring story, but suffice to say the picture posting feature of the new and improved TBU is still in beta testing.

That aside, TB, Flyin’ J and the gang o’ girls had a big time over Memorial Day weekend. For years I held Atlanta in contempt due to several factors, chief among them the legendary rudeness of its service industry including personnel from the CEO down to the bathroom attendants. The Atlanta airport is the worst I have seen, not because it is huge, but because it is dominated by Delta Airlines and their awful employees. (There are plenty of exceptions, but as a rule, that company is terrible.) Beyond the airport I have had some of the worst experiences of my life in Atlanta’s restaurants and hotels. Because Atlanta is a halfway point for my gang and Flyin’ J’s though, I have spent a lot of time there over the last few years. In that time I’ve come to soften my regard for the city after discovering places of refuge scattered all around. Though the hotels are still almost always are staffed by mo-rons. Atlanta locals aren’t much different than any place else, but man, where they find these people for the hotels and the airport….I don’t know.

All that to say that my trip to Stone Mountain blew all that bad experience to smithereens. Stone Mountain is famous for the Confederate relief etched on its face. There is also a train ride, a cable car, a sky hike and a glass blowing shop, among a few other “c” level attractions. There’s also a pretty good laser/fireworks show in the evenings. For an adult trip, I wouldn’t invest my time there. But with kids, I have to say Stone Mountain is an excellent weekend getaway from both a value and entertainment perspective. More than all of that though, and I am still in shock that this was the case, the people we interacted with at the restaurants, in the park and, yes, even the hotel were undoubtedly the friendliest, most helpful service industry folks, as a group, I have ever seen. Atlantan’s all. They honestly transformed a slightly above average getaway into a fantastic one.

Shifting gears, I noticed in the comments that Smily J is going to Graceland. He said it was a little cheesy, but should be fun. Hell, when ain’t cheesy fun? Anyway, it got me thinking about the slightly cheesy must see destinations around the South. You know, the places we all either go or want to go see, but can’t bring ourselves to admit the trip rises to the level of a “vacation.” Graceland definitely qualifies. One of these days I’ll have to go. Stone Mountain is in that category. So too are Rock City and Ruby Falls which I love and probably Dollywood. Not sure if I’ll ever hit that one or not. (heh heh) I know there are more but I can’t think of them. Anybody else want to add to this list?

Finally, I was reminded at least a hundred times on Facebook this weekend to focus on what Memorial Day is all about, to teach my child about “freedom,” and its cost. I know all those messages came from a good place in people’s hearts and I completely agree with their sentiments. I AM thankful for all the people who have died to protect our American freedoms. I’m equally thankful and sad for the many servicemen and women who died in causes that had nothing to do with my freedom but rather were sacrificed only in furtherance of politicians’ interests or multi-national corporations’ profits. As I continued to think about our war dead, as they’d asked, my mind kept travellin’ back to the books I’ve read about men on the front lines in wars from 1776 all the way up through Afghanistan. As a group, how would those men want me to spend my Memorial Day weekend? No one can speak for the dead and TB won’t try. Still my sense of their collective intent is that they would want us to spend the day doing whatever in the hell we’d like. That’s freedom after all. And a lot of them died for it.

Posted in Philosobaen, Travel | Tagged , , , , , , | 6 Comments

Stone Mountain

Image posted by MobyPicture.com
– Posted using MobyPicture.com

Posted in Uncategorized | 2 Comments

Sleepy C

Image posted by MobyPicture.com
– Posted using MobyPicture.com

Posted in Uncategorized | Leave a comment

Road trip

Image posted by MobyPicture.com
– Posted using MobyPicture.com

Posted in Uncategorized | 11 Comments

The TBU Evolves

Quote of the Day:

There is a theory which states that if ever anyone discovers exactly what the Universe is for and why it is here, it will instantly disappear and be replaced by something even more bizarre and inexplicable.There is another theory which states that this has already happened.” –Douglas Adams

A housekeeping post today in the TBU as I prepare for a Memorial Day weekend trip to Atlanta….

First, thanks to everyone who asked for a TBU hat, plus Sweet who got one for being the reigning Grand Exalted Champion of Thursday Pickin’. In lieu of a self-congratulatory two-year blogaversary post this year I decided to instead self-promote. If you consider ten hats that don’t direct you to the website which doesn’t earn any money in the first place promotion, that is, and I guess I do. Plus I thought/think it will be a kick to see where all the TBU name can travel–looking forward to the pictures you send in. I went first come/first serve on who asked for one, so if you didn’t get one I’m sorry.

One thing that honestly never occurred to me is that anyone would actually offer to pay for such a trinket. However there were several offers to pay, and two people suggested I do this again in football season with either more caps or T-shirts. So I’ll probably throw something out there when Thursday Pickin Season III kicks off and see if there is enough interest to order. It will be at cost. The hats run about 10 bucks, with postage, and I can do t-shirts for probably about 12. I have no interest in trying to earn maybe twenty bucks on merchandising. As one person emailed me, the TBU is kind of like a club and we’ll be the only ones around with this stuff.

Other than evolving into mass de minimus merchandising, the TBU has a new toy. My iphone now has an app called “Moby.” Moby allows me to take a picture with my phone and upload it directly to the blog. So beginning………..NOW……..a new feature will be these pictures. They will be accompanied by little or no text, but that doesn’t mean they don’t say anything so please comment on them if you have a thought to share. I have no idea what you may see, other than that it will in some way be interesting or amusing to TB. My posting schedule will remain roughly the same and sadly, so will the quality of the posts.

And this clip has almost nothing to do with any of the above. Almost.

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged | 4 Comments

Buy The Farm?

Quote of the Day:

Ohhh, Moma. Could this really be the end?” –Bob Dylan, Stuck Inside of Mobile with the Memphis Blues Again

The Oilpocalypse is upon us. War rages in Afghanistan. Terrorism and piracy fester and threaten. Hurricane season is coming. Europe’s economy is imploding. Again. And the market is gonna crash again, I just know it. TB read this dire warning yesterday on Marketwatch.com from Paul Farrell, titled Crash is Dead Ahead–Sell. Get Liquid, Now. Paul Farrell is an alarmist. He has been for a long time. Like, right before the last big crash. Farrell has harsh words for Bush and the Republicans for “driving us into the ditch” and even harsher words for Obama and the Democrats for digging it deeper by passing half-measures and refusing to bust up the banks. It’s hard to argue with either of those conclusions.

But on a lighter note, he quotes Barton Biggs, adviser to the multi-millionaire set from his book “Wealth, War and Wisdom.” In the book Biggs advises to buy a farm and “prepare for the breakdown of civilization.” Continuing, “Your safe haven must be self-sufficient and capable of growing some kind of food…It should be well-stocked with seed, fertilizer, canned food, wine, medicine, clothes, etc. Think Swiss Family Robinson.” Hmmm. I was getting alarmed until that Swiss Family Robinson part. Sounds like fun.

Our family already has a farm where we can retreat–a tree farm, but still–and so long as out of date canned goods won’t kill you, my pantry is ready on that count. Let’s see, I have a couple of bottles of two-buck chuck–need to hit a Trader Joe’s and buy another case. Clothes, we’re good. But seed, fertilizer….capable of growing food? Uh-oh. When we sober up after polishing off the vino and vienna sausages, there could be a problem. I’m afraid I couldn’t grow a bean if my life depended on it; I sure hope the Little Scamp has a green thumb. We have plenty of deer, a few turkeys and a nearby river with all sorts of probably-edible creatures, but I don’t have a gun and wouldn’t know what to do with one. We’ll also need hammer and nails and some lumber to make a killer treehouse….man, this is getting ugly fast. Plus there’s no cable out there and the cell coverage is terrible. Oh, moma, I ain’t cut out to be a farmer at all. At least all of y’all down on the Gulf Coast will be able to subsist on fish–oh, wait, check that.

Wouldn’t it be easier to just bust up the damn banks?

Posted in current events, Humor | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 13 Comments

Teddy Roosevelt Revisited

Quote of the Day:

Character, in the long run, is the decisive factor in the life of an individual and of nations alike.” Teddy Roosevelt

TB mentioned here a while back that I was reading “The Imperial Cruise” by James Bradley. I finished it several days ago and have been thinking about how to summarize what I learned, and what I did not. As longtime TBU citizens know, Teddy Roosevelt is one of my most admired U.S. Presidents for many reasons. It is safe to say the author of “The Imperial Cruise” would disagree. From personality flaws to family problems to politics, Bradley seeks to tear down the image of TR as a visage worthy of Mount Rushmore. The book is highly footnoted and well sourced. The facts presented which mar Teddy’s image can mostly withstand interpretation. However, Bradley’s ultimate thesis that Roosevelt’s missteps with regard to Asia led to World War II in the Pacific, the Korean and Vietnam Wars, and our long lasting tension with China are, while plausible, inadequately proved. Without regurgitating the whole book, I’ll say that I agree that serious missteps were made, but that too much blame is placed on TR and too little consideration for American policies that came after him and no consideration of the culpability or lack thereof of the various Asian nations.

You may be surprised then to see that I rate the book a must read. Like many good novels, the details and the background in this non-fiction work are riveting even when the climax fizzles. Primarily the book raises issues and quotes rhetoric from the era that are little different from those we currently hear about on television regarding immigration and foreign policy, the appropriate role of the American military and terrorism. It is at once terrifying to see how nothing has changed and comforting to see that America has survived nonsense identical to what we see these days before. Overriding all else is the theme of how white supremacist thinking overtly guided politicians, theologians, titans of business and philanthropy, generals and even educators of TR’s generation. It’s shocking to read the words of eminent statesmen who are usually associated with democratic ideals unabashedly pontificating on the inferiority of “Negroes”, “Mongolians” and other non-white races. It’s done in a gentlemanly, faux-scholarly way; a noblesse oblige approach to racism as opposed to the violence and intimidation we usually associate with white supremacists. More surprising than anything, nary a single southerner is featured espousing these views. All this from a generation that vividly recalled the Civil War.

Bradley recounts the entrenched white supremacist world view for the purpose of illustrating why Roosevelt and his Secretary of War William Taft acted the way they did. The well supported contention is that Roosevelt viewed Asia, beginning with the Pacific Rim as the next and natural progression of Anglo-Saxon expansion and eventual domination of the world. The American frontier had only been declared eliminated a few years before Teddy took office and remaining Indian opposition to American rule had been crushed. Thus, following the tradition of the Teutons who theoretically began in Central Asia before moving to Germany, then Britain, then across the Atlantic to America, ever westward, it was his duty to see the race continue moving and conquering. In furtherance of this teutonic destiny, America all but stole Hawaii with the assistance of missionaries and the Dole pineapple people, and took over a debacle already well underway in the Philippines from the Spanish. As “masters” of the Philippines, we inherited a brutal, never ending war against the local Muslims. A war we still fight, though on a smaller scale, over a century later. Yes, in the Philippines. One has to wonder if the Spanish were mindful of Tom Sawyer’s fence painting tricks as they withdrew to the mother country. I’ll leave it to Bradley to connect the facts to his conclusions.  For my purposes, it was illuminating to see that much of today’s softer, supposedly color-blind rhetoric is little more than a sugar-coating of the blatantly race-conscious debates of a century before.

Two more examples from the book on how things never change that stand out:

First I’ll quote a passage on the problem of “Mongolian” immigration from the book.

  • From America’s inception in 1783 to 1882, a period of ninety-nine years, there had been no concept of illegal immigrants in the United States. That changed with the Chinese Exclusion Act of 1882. For the first time in U.S. history, an immigration gate was erected with the specific goal of blocking non-whites….But because of the dire race threat presented by the yellow men, most Americans had no problem with the new legislation. Twenty-four years old and just out of Harvard, Theodore Roosevelt proclaimed in 1882, “No greater calamity could now befall the United States than to have the Pacific slope fill up with a Mongolian population.”

Here’s the context. Chinese were brought in the US in huge numbers to help build the transcontinental railroad. Specifically, there courage and expertise with dynamite was needed to get through the Sierra Nevada mountains. Tangent to their railroad labor, Chinese established laundries, general stores, bars and restaurants all throughout the west and they were becoming a major economic force. The immigration paranoia resulted.

Finally, one of the best known photographs of Teddy Roosevelt, famed outdoorsman, is of him dressed in full western regalia, holding a hunting rifle and posed as a frontiersman. It was an image piece, shot in a New York studio. Roosevelt was extremely image conscious and he was quoted as saying he must never be photographed on the tennis court, but rather on a horse or holding a gun if at all possible. I thought the concept was very familiar.

If you can’t accept that America has acted ignorantly, mistakenly, or even criminally through the years in various ways, this book is not for you. It is a slap-in-the-face style reminder that we, no less than others are an imperfect nation. And if you admire Teddy Roosevelt the way I do, you better prepare yourself to reevaluate his legacy. Bill O’Reilly would lump this book and people who appreciate it, like me, into the “blame America first” crowd and say that we hate America. No, I’m proud to be an American, and I still admire TR’s legacy. That doesn’t mean there aren’t blemishes on the record. In fact, to my way of thinking, you can’t love America if you don’t know it in the first place. Read again today’s quote of the day, “Character, in the long run, is the decisive factor in the life of an individual and of nations alike.” Part of having national character is recognizing your country’s mistakes, owning them, and moving on with resolve to do better. “The Imperial Cruise” is a book that gives us a chance to increase our collective character.

Posted in Books, History | Tagged , , , | 3 Comments

TBU Swag

Image posted by MobyPicture.com

Quote of the Day:

He was a dreamer, a thinker, a speculative philosopher….or, as his wife would have it, an idiot.” –Douglas Adams

If by happenstance, or otherwise you should come into possession of a limited edition, heirloom quality Travellinbaen Universe official ball cap, there are a few responsibilities that go with it, to wit:

  1. Wear it. In public.
  2. Travel with it and send in a photo to the TBU, via my email. I want pictures from anywhere you think is cool, fun, funny or otherwise suitable for publication to the TBU. I want this hat to see the world, and me, in turn to see the hat seeing the world.
  3. Bonus points if you are wearing goggles of some type. Shades will do in a pinch.

Now, one thing you should be prepared for if you (a) possess one of these caps and (b) wear it. In public. is that you will be queried by ignorant TBU aliens. For instance, someone may say, “that’s a dumb hat.” If this happens, you just say either (a) oh, yeah? Well the jerk store called and they’re running out of you; or (b) oh, yeah? Well I can take this off and be free of dumb whereas (you need to say whereas, it will make you look smarter) your stuck with being a dumbass your whole life.

More likely, you will get this question: what the hell is Travellinbaen Universe? This is the one I want you to be prepared for most. And (ahem) whereas that question is the most important one to respond appropriately to, I am providing a list of potential responses to such an uncouth, unsophisticated acquaintance. This list is by no means all inclusive, so if you want to posit another option for consideration by the citizenry, please do. Here we go, and remember, you must stare blankly at your interrogator, at all costs:

  • The first rule of Travellinbaen Universe is you don’t talk about Travellinbaen Universe.
  • I could tell you, but then I’d have to kill a beer.
  • Did Little Boy send you?
  • That’s a damn dubious question.
  • Hmphh (snort derisively–but maintain your blank stare) I guess you don’t know what Thursday Pickin is either. Do you?
  • Google “best craps stories.”
  • Do you like…..luxury?
  • Precisely…….precisely.
  • 42

– Posted using MobyPicture.com

Posted in Blank Stares, Humor, Lists | Tagged , , , , , | 9 Comments

Prepare Our Feeble Minds…

….For they are about to be b-lownnn. (You need to channel the voice of Jack Black while reading that title, fyi).

Quote of the Day:

Researchers were also able to maintain the fidelity of the long-distance teleportation at 89 percent— decent enough for information, but still dangerous for the whole-body human teleportation that we’re all looking forward to. –Casey Johnston, author of the article linked below

One day our descendants will look back upon us, assuming we don’t destroy the world before they get a chance, and marvel at our backwardness and technological ignorance. And some researcher might turn up this article and laugh at how little we understood what the human race could achieve. Read and be amazed.

I know most of y’all won’t click so read the QOTD above and simply know that scientists have recently made a significant breakthrough in the quest to teleport. Actually, they call it “quantum teleportation.” They entangled photons and ions and teleported them ten miles. I have virtually zero understanding of what exactly that means, except that it is the first step on the road to “beam me up Scotty.” It blows my feeble mind to consider this will one day be possible.

And to make this a true TBU post, here’s my list of scientific advancements I have heretofore considered impossible, fanciful and unattainable that I now am hoping to see progress on:

  1. Time travel–There was a spate of articles about Stephen Hawking’s theories on the subject a few weeks ago. They will blow your mind too. It actually makes sense.
  2. A 200 year life expectancy–but a lot more birth control
  3. Space colonization–cancel that birth control
  4. Making Pizza, beer and double bubble health foods–so we can live happily to 200
  5. Letting Flock off the island without destroying the universe–I still kind of like him
  6. Remember those hand held computers/datapads everybody had back in Star Wars…oh wait, (use that Jack Black voice again) Check!
  7. Mass two-way audible communication with God–yeah, this goal didn’t work out so well in Babel, but that was Old Testament God (you know what, go back and start over and read the whole post with Jack Black narraratin’ in your head)
  8. An oil vacuum
  9. Mental telepathy
  10. A real live dinosaur island
  11. Personal spacecraft
  12. Getting that teleportation number up a bit more from 89%. But less than 100%. If they can figure out how to isolate which part doesn’t travel, I wouldn’t mind teleportin’ with a little less around the middle. As for now, I find today’s QOTD worthy of a digressive blank stare whilst being otherwise mind blown.

Bonus QOTD

“Whatever one man is capable of conceiving, other men will be able to achieve” –Jules Verne

Posted in current events, science | Tagged , , , , , , | 8 Comments

Boogers (I never say that word)

Quote of the Day:

“Boogers.” (laughter) “Boogers!” (more laughter) “Boogers!!! “(hysterical)     –the Little Scamp

It was a milestone moment at TB’s house last night. The Little Scamp, already showing signs of a strange and wonderful sense of humor in other ways, looked up at me mischievously. “Booger.” I stifled my natural response to laugh, and instead looked down upon her sternly. “That’s not a nice word.” Nonplussed, she was, “Boogers!” I tried to ignore her, to deprive her of whatever response she hoped to provoke. I knew better than to encourage this new, clumsy attempt in shock value humor. But the LS is persistent. “Boogers, Daddy! Say Boogers!” I just walked away, her devilish laughter burning in my ears. “Daddy doesn’t use that word, LS.” And I don’t.

The truth is, it IS, kind of a funny word. Even if she probably doesn’t  know what a booger is yet. Actually, that makes it funnier. Besides that, I don’t know another word for booger. Is there some scientific term? Is there a way to describe the booger in polite society without actually saying it? What did Jesus call boogers? If I knew these things, perhaps I could combat this little antisocial experiment the LS is conducting. And if there is nothing to replace the offending word, if there is really nothing wrong with it but my own hangups, maybe I should just let her win this little battle. Maybe when I get home today and she says, in the deepest tonal octave she can manage, “say Booger”, maybe I’ll just say it. And then we’ll laugh. After all, it really is kind of funny.

Bonus Quote of the Day:

You’ve got the brain of a four-year-old boy, and I bet he was glad to get rid of it.”      Groucho Marx, from Horsefeathers

Posted in Humor, Life | Tagged , , , , , , | 10 Comments