TBU Swag

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Quote of the Day:

He was a dreamer, a thinker, a speculative philosopher….or, as his wife would have it, an idiot.” –Douglas Adams

If by happenstance, or otherwise you should come into possession of a limited edition, heirloom quality Travellinbaen Universe official ball cap, there are a few responsibilities that go with it, to wit:

  1. Wear it. In public.
  2. Travel with it and send in a photo to the TBU, via my email. I want pictures from anywhere you think is cool, fun, funny or otherwise suitable for publication to the TBU. I want this hat to see the world, and me, in turn to see the hat seeing the world.
  3. Bonus points if you are wearing goggles of some type. Shades will do in a pinch.

Now, one thing you should be prepared for if you (a) possess one of these caps and (b) wear it. In public. is that you will be queried by ignorant TBU aliens. For instance, someone may say, “that’s a dumb hat.” If this happens, you just say either (a) oh, yeah? Well the jerk store called and they’re running out of you; or (b) oh, yeah? Well I can take this off and be free of dumb whereas (you need to say whereas, it will make you look smarter) your stuck with being a dumbass your whole life.

More likely, you will get this question: what the hell is Travellinbaen Universe? This is the one I want you to be prepared for most. And (ahem) whereas that question is the most important one to respond appropriately to, I am providing a list of potential responses to such an uncouth, unsophisticated acquaintance. This list is by no means all inclusive, so if you want to posit another option for consideration by the citizenry, please do. Here we go, and remember, you must stare blankly at your interrogator, at all costs:

  • The first rule of Travellinbaen Universe is you don’t talk about Travellinbaen Universe.
  • I could tell you, but then I’d have to kill a beer.
  • Did Little Boy send you?
  • That’s a damn dubious question.
  • Hmphh (snort derisively–but maintain your blank stare) I guess you don’t know what Thursday Pickin is either. Do you?
  • Google “best craps stories.”
  • Do you like…..luxury?
  • Precisely…….precisely.
  • 42

– Posted using MobyPicture.com

About travellinbaen

I'm a 40 year old lawyer living in Ridgeland, Mississippi. I'm several years and a couple hundred miles removed from most of my old running buddies so I started the blog to provide an outlet for many of the observations and ideas that used to be the subjects of our late night/happy hour/halftime conversations and arguments.
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9 Responses to TBU Swag

  1. Mac says:

    Shameless self promotion. I dig it. How would one go about acquiring such an article? Of course, I should warn you that I have a large melon and am insanely picky about my hats as such. But even if it is ill fitting and adds nothing to my already dashing good looks, I would probably be able to furnish some good hat pics.

  2. Jessie Lou says:

    Love the colors – teal is one of my favorite! I want one…… I really, really want one.

  3. B.R. says:

    i expect mine in the mail before june 10th

  4. Jessie Lou says:

    I think it would make the perfect birthday gift for …… ME!

  5. smilyj says:

    If I had one I would send pictures with me at all spots that I enjoy au natural……Me and the hat. Me and ONLY the hat if you are pickin up what I am puttin down?

  6. Harmony says:

    I am surprised to see that “You can’t pigeonhole me!” is not one of the listed options. If I get a hat, I would like to be able to say that. So, umm yeah..how does one go about getting a hat?

  7. Madd Dawg says:

    those photos will have to be extreme close ups for any of us to notice your au natural – ness

  8. Harmony, I sent you an email to your blog account.

  9. Barista says:

    I look really bad in hats. But I could hang it somewhere. Or tie it to my dog’s tail or somethin

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