Quote of the Day “While I understand that Sen. Lieberman has voted with Democrats a majority of the time, his comments and actions have raised serious concerns among many in our caucus.” —Harry Reid, Senate Majority Leader in a passionate? rebuke of Joe Lieberman’s role in the recent Presidential campaign
A hot topic of debate and speculation in the news this week centers around what the Senate Democrats should do with Joe Lieberman in light of his support for John McCain’s presidential campaign. Lieberman has a long, reliable history of voting on the progressive side of domestic issues. He has gotten more publicity however for his hawkish war views and support for Bush/Neocon foreign policy positions. In schoolboy terms, what has happened is one crowd’s long-time, close and loyal friend has shamed himself. What’s worse is he did it in furtherance of the goals of the rival crowd, one to which he does not now and never will fit. He doesn’t want to switch cliques and the opposite clique really only wants him around so they can stick it in the eye of their rivals. But his old pals may not want him on their side anymore unless he is sufficiently punished and humbled in retribution for his crimes. There is now much wrangling about which Senatorial chores Lieberman can keep as one of the old gang–whether he gets to keep wearing a uniform and be the school crossing guard or whether he’s relegated to cleaning erasers during P.E.
Since the Dems are having trouble coming up with something appropriate, here’s a few sanctions inspired by those my asshole runnin buddies used on one another through the years. They were harsh enough to punish, yet reasonable enough to keep the offending ARB from bolting for a rival, less suitable crowd. These are all time tested and they all work.
- Call him “King Yak” for the duration of Obama’s term in office.
- Make him run around the Capitol in his underwear on the first night below freezing each year yelling “Obama Is My Daddy” once every 57 58 yards.
- Ban him from getting “shotgun”, even if he calls it first.
- Make him permanent designated driver for Redskins games.
- Next time a Dem gets caught in the sack with someone they shouldn’t, Joe has to explain it to the wife, and defend the dude on Oprah, O’Reilly and Larry King.
- When he’s outside the Senate chamber assign a page to sit in his chair. When Joe gets back the page sits resolutely, repeating, “move your meat, lose your seat.”
- He has to go on the Sunday talk shows during the next round of budget negotiations and declare, “I love pork.”
- When the next election season comes around, Joe has to play the role of Sarah Palin during Obama’s debate prep. Even if she isn’t running.
- At the inauguration parade, Joe has to stand on Pennsylvania Avenue and funnel a six-pack (blank stare). And he better not yak.
Anybody got any other suggestions?