TB On Oscar (not that there’s anything wrong with that)

Quote of the Day:

“The only point in making money is you can tell any SOB in the world to go to hell.     –Humphrey Bogart

  1. Is it really necessary to have a prestigious accounting firm to tabulate “over 6000 votes?” Honestly, TB will count the votes for half of whatever Price-Waterhouse charges and I’ll look a lot cooler delivering the briefcases than Mssr’s P&W. Saying “count” in place of “tabulate” makes it a lot more cost effective by the way.
  2. You know that joke in the opening when they told that kid with the skinny eyes and the neck goiter from the Vampire movie and the other young dude they would look like  Steve Martin and  Alec Baldwin in five years? Then they cut to Jeff Bridges? I would’ve said “this is what you will look like in ten years.” That’s Gold, seriously. But overall I enjoyed the hosting and the opening duologue, and I cracked up at the Baldwin-Clooney stare-downs. Props to Doogie Howser for the opening number too. As the night wore on, I decided we could’ve done without Baldwin. Martin could handle the stare-down joke on his own, too.
  3. I’m married. I am at home today. Therefore I watched twenty-six hours of red carpet, the whole show and the post mortem. Hey this is her Super Bowl. With the excuses now behind me…..Sarah Jessica Parker is not the hottest chick in Hollywood by any stretch. But I’m down with the whole dress strap around the neck look. Forget what you think about her guys, we all dig that look, am I wrong?
  4. The greatest movie ever is Casablanca. The Rambler informs me this is the first year since Casablanca swept the night in 1943 that ten movies were nominated for best picture. That’s some solid trivia, make a mental note of it.
  5. See the first four sentences of No. 3. I thought Charlize Theron wore possibly the least sexy dress of all time. The boob circles made her look like a 90 year old body double from the neck to the belly. Or, they looked like vaginas. On the chest. TB ain’t no Picasso fan.
  6. I was glad to see my old XM Cross-Country (The Suck Stopped There) buddy Ryan Bingham win for “Best Song.” Really need to see Crazy Heart. I was pulling for that movie even though I haven’t seen it yet. Illogical yes, you can’t pigeonhole me.
  7. I did see District 9. Yeah, I got that it was social commentary. I even agreed with the commentary. Didn’t like the movie though.
  8. Please Coen Bros. Please Jeff Bridges. Bring back the Dude. But only if Sam Elliot will play God again.
  9. The John Hughes tribute was cool. Molly Ringwald was a fright.
  10. I saw Precious. Yeah, I love my wife, I ain’t scared to say it. That movie’s not my bag, but it deserves the plaudits. A sad, sad, sad story, and convincingly performed with minimal melodrama.
  11. I missed everything from 8:50-9:45 while on Little Scamp bath and bedtime duty.
  12. Review No. 3 again. Kate Winslet looked great and I like the way she talks. So did Clooney. Yeah, I said it. I liked Anna Kendrick too. James Cameron’s ex-wife is totally hotter than his current one, but it looked like they all get along, which is nice. I probably ought to see The Hurt Locker.
  13. Wouldn’t it be cool if they had nominated something like The Hangover for “Best Makeup ” or “Sound Achievement?” or “Best Animated Short” or some other category nobody cares about outside the 90210? If I were voting it would probably be Best Picture but since the Academy eschews comedy, they could at least throw out a bone for a true classic that, unlike most of the 27 nominees for Best Picture, will NOT be forgotten in a year, and on Sunday afternoons for the next twenty-five years, between dubbed versions of Smoky and the Bandit and Breakfast Club we could also see a hilarious-in-its-own-way censor approved version of The Hangover, introduced in the interminable “Yella Wood” commercials, “and now, back to the Academy Award winning, The Hangover.” I tell you one thing…if TB was counting the votes, I could make it happen. And save the Academy a bundle in the process.
  14. When I get old I want to be like Christopher Plummer. Well, that’s assuming I can’t be like Clooney.
  15. Up in the Air was good. They nailed the work-travellin life. Clooney rules. But Oscar? Sorry, no. And Clooney for Best Actor? He plays a good-hearted, charming, roguish, independent, smooth-talking ladies man. This role was not a stretch.
  16. Who thinks Sandra Bullock is hot? I mean by Hollywood standards. She just doesn’t crank my engine. I ain’t just hatin’ just because she played an Ole Miss grad either. Kate Beckinsale is hot. I didn’t see her tonight. Michelle Pfeiffer’s still got it. I’ll say this for Sandra, she seems like a pretty cool chick and gave a good acceptance speech.
  17. Tim Robbins had the line of the night (unless somebody got one off between 8:50-9:45) introducing Morgan Freeman. Paraphrasing here, “Morgan Freeman taught me what it means to be a friend. On the last day of shooting Shawshank, he pulled me aside and said “Friendship is getting the other person a cup of coffee. Could you do that for me, Ted?”
  18. T-Bone Burnett. Good music. Awesome name. Cool shades, at night, indoors. Looks like he works at Price-Waterhouse? Doesn’t add up.
  19. Best visual of the night–Tom Hanks almost forgot to give the statue for Best Picture to the beautiful and talented Catherine Bigelow, director of The Hurt Locker and the night’s big winner.
  20. TB stayed up twenty-three minutes longer than I wanted to so I could bring you these observations and opinions. So you better appreciate it. That and I thought I might get to hear Clooney make an acceptance speech. Yeah, I like him, he’s a beautiful and talented man. Not that there’s anything wrong with that.
  21. Discuss amongst yourselves.

About travellinbaen

I'm a 40 year old lawyer living in Ridgeland, Mississippi. I'm several years and a couple hundred miles removed from most of my old running buddies so I started the blog to provide an outlet for many of the observations and ideas that used to be the subjects of our late night/happy hour/halftime conversations and arguments.
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15 Responses to TB On Oscar (not that there’s anything wrong with that)

  1. Workinbaen says:

    Dang I knew this would be full of typos. I’ll fix em later. Too hard to do on the phone. Meant to write bring back the DUDE, that error was pretty immense.

  2. irvineredd says:

    I actually watched most of the oscars. And I did it alone with no woman to force on me. I’ve got no real opinion about any of the movies that won anything with the exception of the guy from Inglorious Basterds and Jeff Bridges.

    Something that has always bothered me is the complete lack of respect these awards shows give to comedies. They act like it’s easy to be obscenely funny. And when they do decide to give some credit to comedies it’s always something like “As Good as it Gets”, which was funny, but not the seminal comedy of the decade. I don’t think the Hangover is quite on that level either, but certainly very, very, funny. I just don’t get the uppity nature of ignoring comedy. It’s much harder to be intrinsically funny than it is to be sad.

    And, bringing back the Dude, could either be the greatest move ever, or the saddest destruction of something fantastic.

  3. I can never understand why Hollywood has such a poor success rate with sequels. An author can pen a dozen awesome books with one main character, why shouldn’t the movies be able to as well? But you are correct, a second coming of the Dude would be risky.

    For the record, cognizant that you suggested nothing of the kind Irv, As Good As It Gets can’t hold The Hangover’s jock strap.

  4. I did a big ole belly laugh at Tim Robbins’ joke.

    When a movie is about a real person, that real person should be in attendance. Thus, Michael Oher should have been on stage in an Ole Miss jersey……during the whole broadcast…….and inset during commercials.

  5. irvineredd says:

    Oh, of course it could not. It just falls in line with the kind of comedies the oscars tend to recognize, like a couple of years ago with Little Miss Sunshine. A funny, but dramatic movie. Not really a comedy, like As Good as It Gets is not really a comedy, more of a drama with some laughs.

    I mean, couldn’t they at least have a Best Comedy of the Decade category at the end of every decade. Give it up for the comics at least once. Just give an award to the movie that was the seminal comedy or the best representation of comedic film of the decade. For instance, Anchorman. A Judd Apatow production with the biggest comic star of the decade, just give it a statue. How hard would that be?

    DW, having Michael Oher on stage would possibly have been the best thing ever done at the Oscars.

  6. Mac says:

    District 9 was among the worst movies I have ever seen. I did not watch the Oscars.

  7. Jessie Lou says:

    My thoughts are as follows:

    1. I always love Morgan Freeman – we have the same birthday and I have a picture of me with his wax figure in London – very cool to me.
    2. Love Jeff Bridges – the dude abides forever.
    3. Sam Elliott – Very sexy – great chest – right up there with Tom Selleck. I’d listen to him in anything – also plays a great villain.
    4. Christopher Plummer is always debonair but I love old men . . . for many reasons.
    5. I could not make myself watch Precious or District 9 – I see how one got nominated but not the other. I hate to heighten my depression by watching someone have to live like Precious.
    6. I hope Jeff Bridges and his wife, Susan, like each other as much as they seem to – that would be a major disappointment.
    7. Alec Baldwin – should get best looking over weight guy award. I like him with Steve Martin – you should see “It’s Complicated” – I thought it was great.
    8. I think it all turned out the way it should – award wise. I like to see someone who is pigeonholed in one area like Monique was for comedy to win an award for something totally different.
    9. I thought Sandra looked really good. Kate Winslet as well. I really did not see anyone who I thought was a knock out. I just hope I look as good as Helen Mirren when I’m her age. I recently saw some pictures of her in her younger years and she was a knock out – still is for an older gal in my book.

  8. Harmony says:

    I, too, did not watch the Oscars. I think this is a nice summary of the event though. Thanks TB!

  9. tkh says:

    Sandra Bullock is attractive but not “hot” by movie standards, however she is keeping a husband happy who used to be married to a porn star. I’m just saying…

  10. smilyj says:

    Clooney is a dork. Yeah, I said it. Kate Beckinsale is soooooooo hot. You are correct sir. I agree with the neck strap thing too. I think they snub comedies such as “Hangover” cause they think they are too intelligent for that sort of humor. But you had to just not be a nerd growing up and be able to relate to the movie’s humor. Sam Elliot rules. Clooney is a phoney.

  11. sweet says:

    Clooney is cool and should go back to the slick Hollywood do and I have a man crush on Downey, Jr. …and smily

  12. Fish says:

    I have to agree with Howard Stern on one thing though. That girl from Precious is dangerously unhealthy. Gonna be tough for her to land another part.

  13. Madd Dawg says:

    Re: item #1. When my brother first started working a couple of years ago, one of his rotating assignments was to oversee the drawing of the numbers for the Georgia lottery. I am sure that his accounting firm charged the State a ton of money for this service and then sent some first year CPA to cover it.

  14. smilyj says:

    I have a man crush on Vin Diesel….and Sweet.

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