Quotes of the Day: “Ah, how good it feels! The hand of an old friend.” –Henry Wadsworth Longfellow
” Friendship is unnecesary, like philosopy, like art….It has no survival value; rather it is one of those things that give value to survival.”–C.S. Lewis
I’ll be attending the Pascagoula High School Class of 1988 reunion this summer. I don’t really want to, and I don’t know why. I think about and I miss my old friends often. I had a great experience in High School. I sure don’t have anything better to do that weekend.
Maybe its because it all seems so superficial and contrived to “reunite” with several hundred people, or even the hundred plus that will show up, over drinks in three hours. Maybe there is a subconscious desire to think of these people as they were at 17, rather than 37, as a means of continuing to self delude myself that we are not so far removed from that time. I think more than anything its the sense of futility. We will promise to do better at staying in touch, but we won’t. I’ll see these old, trusted friends, and I’ll want to know them again.
I have often thought about the nature of friendships begun in adulthood versus those of one’s childhood. They are no less important, one than the other. We had much greater latitude in choice of the friends we made after graduation; consequently we have more in common with our newer friends as far as current interests, ideas, and difficulties. But the friends of our youth, thrust together by school and sports, know us in a way that is unique. They know us in a way that is in part more true, since they saw us before we learned to conceal our emotions and suppress our instincts. And they know that part of us where the awkwardness goes to hide after college. And they know how lucky we were to survive some reckless years.
I guess I really am looking forward to seeing everyone. I just hope its as much fun as it ought to be. And I hope we’ll all vow to keep in touch.
Travellinbaen 
I don’t know how you young kids will do it (remember I’m older and wiser than you), but I found my 20th class reunion to be at times fun, but mostly odd. I thought I was putting forth the same sense of humor that I’ve always had, but I was not getting the results I had hoped to achieve or, better put, once gotten.
Everyone seemed a little stuffier, a little older one might say. I never equated older as necessarily meaning boring. Granted, I haven’t broken into a water slide at 3 a.m. since I was 20, but I also don’t hesitate to get on the floor and let my kids treat my horribly out-of-shape body like a carnival ride. The people at my reunion seemed to have spent too much time “growing up” and less time just getting older.
Having said all that, there were lots of laughs and remember whens. There were re-affirmations of getting together that were then immediately forgotten. But it’s certainly not the same. The easy answer is Well, you’re not the same people. But that’s only partially true. Unless you’ve undergone electro-shock therapy or been lobotomized, age doesn’t drastically change your personality.
So, my simpleton advice would be to try to re-connect to those aspects of your friends’ personalities that still match up with your own while understanding that there are areas where you’ve grown apart. I think you said that already, and more artfully, but I wanted to ramble on. Oh, and get real drunk.
Go – you will be glad you did. I had a great time at my 20th reunion – I could have taken a date but did not and I was glad I didn’t. There is alot less trying or putting on, for lack of better terminology – you are what you are – no need to fake that at 37. And face it – you’ve accomplished more than many in your class and that is from an outsider looking in.