Advice for Obama, continued….
Groceries and prison overcrowding: they go together like peas and a box of chocolates. Stay with me. People hate high cereal prices and they hate crime. Bonus hatred for illegal immigrants. We are going to set up a program to provide cheap labor in the form of non-violent inmates, largely meth-heads and Worldcom executives. On a volunteer basis, these prisoners will be rewarded with time off their sentences in exchange for providing labor to jobs not many Americans really desire–on farms and in chicken processing plants here in Mississippi for the most part. Right now, these jobs are largely targeted by illegal immigrants. Convicts will receive a nominal salary in addition to their time off, which will be taxed at the normal rate, then deducted further to contribute to their food and shelter at county lockup, and the remainder placed in an account for them to access when they serve their time. Food prices will drop or remain more stable as a result of lower overhead, prison expenses will be curtailed, and the job market for illegal immigrants will shrink. Everybody wins, am I right?